I really don't like Mondays

I have tried, I really have to like them but to no avail. I think the reason I don't like them is because after being with the kids and my wonderful husband all weekend, I really hate to see them all go on Monday and the house seems too quiet. Oh well, what can you do, the kids have to go to school the, Chris has to go to work and Monday has to come so I guess I better learn to love it cause it keeps on coming. :)

Things have been going good lately, almost too good. Chris and I were able to get away 2 weeks ago for the church's marriage retreat. We had a wonderful time, we usually do, which at times I have such a hard time wrapping my brain around. In all my past I can never really remember enjoying a man's company as much as I do his. He makes me laugh, he makes me cry (in a good way), he challenges me. I love that about him. Our retreat's curriculum this year was titled "Love and Respect" awesome, awesome stuff. I actually had one of those great "aha" moments. I found that I had been punishing my husband for things that in all honesty were my doing. I was being disrespectful and in turn his reaction was to be distant and the more he became distant the more disrespectful I would become. We were on the "crazy cycle". I am happy to now have that knowledge and to hopefully not jump back on that cycle again but if we do then maybe for not so long.

I just found out Friday that next year's retreat is scheduled for January, so that means that we get another weekend all alone in less than a year...woohoo!!! I think we need them twice a year personally. Every couple needs time away just to reconnect, it totally renews and rejuvenates the spirit and allows you to remember what it was like when you were dating.

I am still on the weight loss wagon, I am doing good (or at least I think I am) and let's be honest that is all that really matters. I have gone down 1 pant size in my jeans and in my shirts I actually bought a shirt out of the regular women's department...now mind you it was a t-shirt but it was still a small victory for me. I have about 10 more days till I go weigh again but I did weigh out at my sister's a couple of weeks ago and according to her scales I had lost another 5 pounds but as scales go they differ from one to the other. I actually am finding it easier to resist certain things, I have been working way too hard to mess up and I am loving how I am feeling. I never realized how bad the wrong foods can make you feel. I now realize how much of a mind over matter deal it really is. They say it takes 21 days to make a new habit, I honestly believe that now. As I sit here and type this, there are a dozen doughnuts sitting out on my kitchen table, do I want to eat one....kinda...will I...NO!! Because now instead of not caring what goes in my mouth or if I am even hungry, I say....do I really need that?? Surprisingly, the answer is no more often than not. So, if nothing else changes besides that....then I have made progress.

Well I have rambled on long enough, probably wouldn't do that if I blogged more often. :) Until next time...think twice before you grab that doughnut....a moment on the lips....forever on the hips.

Latest news

Well this week didn't have very many surprises, other than a very unexpected snow fall that hit yesterday morning and had things all kinds of messed up and ugly for a little while. We were busy all weekend with things for other people, Saturday morning and almost all day had us at our church testing and putting in a new sound board and tuning it up. Sunday was church, lunch and then we had to be at another church at 5 for a special ministry event. Now that was a whole new experience I have to say. But a good one, long, but good.

I weighed in yesterday, I am happy to say that I have lost 16 lbs since January 28. I was proud of myself. I have really been trying to cut back and watch what I eat and exercise also. I know, I know....all that stuff that I should have been doing all along. Don't judge me!! LOL

Things are still good at home, thankfully. I am so looking forward to Chris and I being able to get away for 3 days in a couple of weeks. We are having our church's annual Marriage Retreat in Pigeon Forge. I know it isn't a large amount of time but we always have such a great time together. Well we always have, we love doing stuff together whether it be from grocery shopping to having a romantic dinner. We always manage to laugh and enjoy each other. I have a hard time grasping sometimes a man that actually wants to be with me or enjoys it. My experience in the past has not always been that. I am so blessed and lucky to have such a wonderful man.

Well that's about all for now...I am sure I will have more later...till then...be sweet!!

I'm Sorry

Two words, not big words in the sense of letters but bigger in the sense of what they mean. When you are wronged or hurt....you expect them almost as a way of making amends and healing a hurt. We teach our kids to say it when they hurt another child during play or if they do something wrong. They learn quickly that sometimes their actions or words are wrong and in turn they are supposed to apologize for their actions. So why then is it so hard to do it as an adult, we learned it as children but as adults it doesn't seem to matter or is a long forgotten art of making amends. Is it pride that holds a person back from apologizing or is it the very act of having to say that you are possibly wrong that keeps you from saying it? It takes two people to argue, two people to cause the discord, two people to say loud or mean things that are not always what you are meaning to say but when only one person says I am sorry, it is as if the one person is taking the responsibility for the entire argument, when the same one person is the one always apologizing it begins to feel like you are the reason for all the problems in the relationship. If you haven't figured it out by now, this person is me. Chris and I don't argue that much, maybe once a month or even less but when we do it usually begins with either one of us saying something we didn't mean or it coming out the wrong way and then it escalates from there.

We are both very stubborn people and when we think we are right about something we sink our teeth into it and don't let go. Each of us wanting the other to listen to our points and it ends up being a lecturing session, "this is what you do wrong all the time", "you never listen to me" "it wasn't what you said, but how you said it" or "well, you might as well of said it this way, I know that is what you meant" ....I know, sounds stupid to me even writing it down. This is the crap we fight about, but at the time it is the most important thing in the world, or at least we think it is.