I just looked at the date that I had last posted a blog and realized that 7 months of my life had slipped by and I haven't said anything. So here goes.
Things have changed a lot at our house, we moved into a new house on September 16, why do I remember the date exactly, 2 reasons, first it was my husband's b-day and second it was the day that our family felt like we got our freedom back. We had been living in my grandmother's house and paying her rent. This woman was relentless and so nosy that we got to calling her "big brother". We were almost to the point were we think she knew stuff before we did!! LOL
So we are now moved and settled in and so much more at peace here.
My youngest son Tanner is living back with us. We are loving having him here and everything and everybody is getting along nicely. Now as for my oldest son...I haven't seen him since Christmas. He came and got his gifts and hasn't been back to our house since. I guess that is all we are good for. Had I known he was going to act this way...he wouldn't have gotten anything. I miss him terribly and would love to see him but for some unknown reason he is mad at me and refuses to tell me why or what I might have done. He won't accept my phone calls and when I try to text him...the only response I ever get is "don't text me" or " I am going to have your number blocked". I refuse to give up on him though. I love him and pray daily that God will maybe help me heal this relationship. I keep wanting to think that maybe it is just a phase, that he will come back to me and actually want to talk to me or see me. In the meantime though I really do miss him and love him.
As for my weight loss on again/off again goals and thoughts...I have jumped back on the wagon and for the past month have started watching what I eat, cutting out the sweets and snacks (or at least the bad ones) and began to exercise. I have a goal of 10 pounds a month and by george I will do what ever I have to, to get there. I am only weighing once a month, no sense in making myself become a scale junkie...I could never live that way....maybe after I lose quite a bit of weight that might be more feasible but at this point...it is just another way to bring me down.
I do know that it is working so far because I put on a pair of jeans that had become tight over that past year and when I put them on yesterday I didn't have to struggle to get them on and buttoned. I didn't even have to do that awkward tight pant squat down just trying to get them to stretch a little bit.
I don't know about the rest of you but I blame it on the dryer..that darn thing just kept shrinking my clothes so I thought I better do something to try and keep up with it. I can't afford to be buying clothes all the time. :)
My goal is to try and lose 100 lbs by the time our Disney World trip rolls around at the end of October. I want to be able to ride the rides with the kids without fear of being told I am too fat to fasten the belt or fit in the seats.
I want to be able to sit in my husband's lap without worrying is he gonna need an air pump when I get up or worse yet....is he even gonna be able to stand up!! LOL I know I laugh about it and make jokes but I really do want the simple things. I want my husband to be able to hug me and lift me off the ground if he wants to...at this point in the game it would mean an extra set of hands and quite possibly a wench....and that just takes all the romantic stuff out of it. :) I mean how romantic is a guy in traction?? Plus I would love to be able to buy the cute clothes instead of dreading when I know I need something new and having to go to the fat section and pick from their many choices of knit pants and colored tent tops. I want to wear sexy jeans and have my man look at me with that look.
So we will see what happens...I can tell you the one difference this time then the other hundred times I have attempted to lose weight...it was my decision this time and there is a fire in me that wants to be thinner.
Here goes!!! This could be fun and heartbreaking at the same time....I am sure I will let you know!!
K-Mac
